[ Nathan Drake, truly the biggest person on the Moira. ]
Great. [ Drily, because he knows enough about being trapped in deserts to not poke too much fun at that particular topic, ] I'll be there in ten, archnemesis.
[ He shows up seven minutes late (what a dick), looking like a guy coming off the worst drunken bender of his life. Which, for Tony Stark, is... saying something. He's also attempting to look extremely glib about it. ]
[Nate actually looks better than he did during the party. He doesn't look great, but he's no longer stressed and freaking out, which is a step up. And he's sketching, which always seems to relax him.]
[ Tony takes the initiative of just parking his ass on the floor next to him, and is gracious enough not to lean over and squint at whatever he's drawing. Yet. ]
So. What's it like being the only guy who didn't get alien-roofied?
Oh, I did. I definitely did. [He grimaces at the memory.] It just wore off, or something. I don't know, maybe I have a natural resistance. But it sucked once it happened. It was like you all insisted that the sky was blue and no one would listen when I said it was fucking chartreuse.
First of all, "chartreuse" is the most pretentious word I've ever heard you say.
Second... [ He actually winces a little, because yeah, none of it makes sense in retrospect. Why the hell hadn't any of them listened? He knows why - they were mindfucked until nothing mattered anymore - but that doesn't change his rational mind grinding itself into dust trying to make sense of it. ]
[He shrugs. Seemed like the most appropriate color.]
Don't feel too bad. I got drugged twice in one week right before I ended up here, and I didn't handle it much better. Actually, I wonder if that's why I came out of it faster—helped me build up an immunity or something.
I could always be your hypeman while you drink enough for both of us.
[ He peers down at the sketchbook once it's lowered at an angle where he can see it, slightly taken aback. Okay, that's not the rock formation or tree or garden plant that he'd expected this dumb nerd to be drawing. ]
She doesn't technically exist yet—okay, that sounds really weird.
[Probably because it is.]
When people starting changing ages, Elena suddenly turned up older and told me about her. And then the other day, the Ingress spat out one of our photo albums from home that had some brand-new pictures I haven't taken...yet.
[ He's a little envious, actually. Maybe not child-envy (isn't that a fucking terrifying thought), but the idea of future information that isn't harrowing or dreadful. Nate and Elena probably among those who deserve it the most. ]
Should I congratulate you on your kid you haven't quite gotten around to conceiving yet?
I'm setting the scene here. Flashback: you, several months ago, rolling around forlornly on the floor of the observation deck.
"Elena will leave me forever, I'm the worst, this is the end, there's nowhere to go from here!"
The scene cuts to me, telling you you're overreacting and that's definitely not gonna happen, having foreseen your little Drake nugget with my endless wisdom and understanding of future events.
[ Listen just let him have the satisfaction of this. ]
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Great. [ Drily, because he knows enough about being trapped in deserts to not poke too much fun at that particular topic, ] I'll be there in ten, archnemesis.
[ He shows up seven minutes late (what a dick), looking like a guy coming off the worst drunken bender of his life. Which, for Tony Stark, is... saying something. He's also attempting to look extremely glib about it. ]
'Sup.
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'sup.
[Nate actually looks better than he did during the party. He doesn't look great, but he's no longer stressed and freaking out, which is a step up. And he's sketching, which always seems to relax him.]
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So. What's it like being the only guy who didn't get alien-roofied?
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Oh, I did. I definitely did. [He grimaces at the memory.] It just wore off, or something. I don't know, maybe I have a natural resistance. But it sucked once it happened. It was like you all insisted that the sky was blue and no one would listen when I said it was fucking chartreuse.
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Second... [ He actually winces a little, because yeah, none of it makes sense in retrospect. Why the hell hadn't any of them listened? He knows why - they were mindfucked until nothing mattered anymore - but that doesn't change his rational mind grinding itself into dust trying to make sense of it. ]
Yeah, I got nothin'. What the hell.
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Don't feel too bad. I got drugged twice in one week right before I ended up here, and I didn't handle it much better. Actually, I wonder if that's why I came out of it faster—helped me build up an immunity or something.
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Have I told you this week that your life is bullshit?
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[It sucked both times.]
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I was serious about that drink thing, though.
[ This is the closest to "sorry" that you're gonna get, Drake. ]
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[He sets the sketchbook down in his lap. It's a mostly-finished sketch of a little girl.]
Gonna be hard to have those drinks if you're not imbibing anything.
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[ He peers down at the sketchbook once it's lowered at an angle where he can see it, slightly taken aback. Okay, that's not the rock formation or tree or garden plant that he'd expected this dumb nerd to be drawing. ]
... Huh.
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[He catches the reaction to his drawing and grins. There's a hint of fatherly pride in the smile.]
That's my daughter.
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[ He leans forward abruptly, staring at the drawing with way more attention.
Nathan Drake procreated. Well, goddamn. ]
Holy shit.
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[Probably because it is.]
When people starting changing ages, Elena suddenly turned up older and told me about her. And then the other day, the Ingress spat out one of our photo albums from home that had some brand-new pictures I haven't taken...yet.
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[ He's a little envious, actually. Maybe not child-envy (isn't that a fucking terrifying thought), but the idea of future information that isn't harrowing or dreadful. Nate and Elena probably among those who deserve it the most. ]
Should I congratulate you on your kid you haven't quite gotten around to conceiving yet?
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[He'll take it, even if he hasn't earned the congrats yet. Not that his part in the baby-making is especially difficult.]
It is a pretty big spoiler, but I'll take it. A sign that I don't end up fucking things up irrevocably is pretty welcome.
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[ DRAMATIC PAUSE. What an ass. ]
Does that mean I get to say "I told you so"?
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[He doesn't doubt that there's probably a legit reason Tony might say it, but he can't remember specific possibilities at the moment.]
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"Elena will leave me forever, I'm the worst, this is the end, there's nowhere to go from here!"
The scene cuts to me, telling you you're overreacting and that's definitely not gonna happen, having foreseen your little Drake nugget with my endless wisdom and understanding of future events.
[ Listen just let him have the satisfaction of this. ]
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[Is accurate, honestly. Kind of. Not a great memory, but it is nice to know that his drunken fears hadn't come true.]
All right, so you can say you told me so and we're even there. But I didn't roll.
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"Sitting straight and dignified" for somebody that drunk definitely looks like rolling to the rest of the world.
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Yeah, yeah, don't enjoy it too much, your head will swell up.
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[He grins and gives his sketch one more look before closing the book.]
You know, if I want to practice on this parenting thing before my kid gets here, I can do it with myself now. Have you met the tiny me on the ship?
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[ NEVER FORGIVE NEVER FORGET.
But, actually - now that he mentions it... ]
Wait. [ Yes, he remembers that kid. ] ... That's actually a tiny you?
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